Well Tuesday was the day we had been waiting for and dreading for the better part of a year. I had run through the list of quirks to talk about and a list of 100's of questions and the night before Diagnosis Day I felt a bit numb. I expected to feel anxious, stressed, or down right crazy. And instead I felt as though it was little more than a formality, a hoop to be jumped through to achieve a goal. After the initial stage of denial when they first uttered the word Aspergers to us, I had decided that knowledge is power and began reading everything I could get my grubby little hands on that related to Aspergers and Autism. And after about the second or third book I felt like I was reading Logan's story over and over. It didn't take long for Sam and I to admit that our son most likely had Aspergers.
The few months after we received the referral I felt as thought we cast out in the middle of a stormy ocean, alone without guidance. "By the way, we think your son has Asperger's a type of Autism. By the way it take between 8 months and a year to be seen by the developmental pediatrician. Good Luck." That is all we got. And there we are with a 4 year old that is so smart we have a hard time keeping him stimulated, he is struggle in school due to social and sensory problems, he still isn't potty trained, and we still really had no clue to what was prompting his tantrums and stress. When I called the office to find out about when he would be seen, they informed us that we "might" be able to speak to a nurse if it was an emergency. So unless he tries to burn the house down, forget it! It was a dark time for us. There were a lot of tears, and lots and lots of research. After we started him at the Early Intervention Preschool and got his evaluation scores back from them we embraced what we had known for a while. The test scores showed he was advanced in language, and on track for cognitive(which the Dr told us the score was pulled down because he didn't understand abstract ideas like time), and had significant delays in social, adaptive and fine motor skills. The school can't diagnosis him but I know that is exactly what they find in kids with Aspergers.
So the last few months have been filled with coping techniques, picture charts, social stories, and anything else that we thought might help. We also began letting people know what was going on, and even talked to Logan a little bit about it. I asked him if he had heard us talk about Aspergers. And he said he had. So I explained that all it means is that his brain works differently that other kids. Some things he is going to pick up very quickly , and other things like social skills and potty training he is going to have to try very hard to learn. He seemed satisfied with the explanation almost as if he knew what I meant. So now that we were staring down the looming D Day I didn't have the anxiety I expected. I was already at peace with everything that made my son special and amazing including Aspergers.
The office visit was very long. I believe we were there for over 2 hours. We went over all the school tests and all the tests that they had done and every single one he fell into the small area on the Autism Spectrum where Aspergers falls. We also spent a long time discussing if now was the right time for him to be diagnosed. 4 is very young for an Aspergers diagnosis, apparently it normally happens between 6 and 8. After talking out all the pros and cons, the Dr decided it was in Logan's best interest to diagnose him now. My opinion was if it looks like a duck, walk like a duck, acts like a duck, and is responding to a duck call, lets call it a duck so he can get the help a duck might need. In the end, they did diagnose him with Autism Spectrum Disorder, and he falls where Aspergers currently is on the spectrum. As of the release of the next DSM-5 Aspergers is no longer a diagnosis, and it will all be under the umbrella diagnosis of ASD. That is a post for another day though.
Through out the appointment we received a ton of very encouraging news. First off although he needs help in several areas he said that getting Logan through school will be the hardest part. He also said that all though they won't do an IQ test until around 6, his language and cognitive scores are a very good indication that he will be incredibly bright and combined with his ability to hyper focus on certain subjects, as in adult he most likely will be amazing in whatever career he chooses. We also went over the services we have lined up for the next school year and who we contact for any other services we may need. He was very happy with the plan we had in place. All in all I thought I would cry hearing it be finalized, surprisingly my reaction was one of relief and resolve to be my son's biggest advocate. The hardest part is over now we know and can help him acquire the skills needed to be a successful adult. I guess now we just wait and see where this adventure takes us.
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