Well a lot of people wonder what happens after D-Day? What happens when you know your child has Aspergers? Well for us it was time to jump into action and embrace the amazing child that was meant for us. It seems like a big responsibility not only do we need to help him in the areas he is behind but we need to keep up with his amazing little brain! We have been blessed with an amazing support system which has been instrumental in getting Logan this far. He is enrolled in 2 different preschools. In the morning 3 days a week he goes to a Co-op preschool and in the afternoon he is enrolled in the Early Intervention Preschool through the school district on his IEP.
At the Co-op he has the opportunity to play and learn with an amazing group of kids. It is a very loving, secure environment where the parents are really involved! It has been amazing to see him surrounded by not just Sam and I but an entire group of adults who take the time to understand how his little brain works and take the time to walk him through the social and emotional missteps that are common place for him. The teacher, Michelle has a unique bond with him, and somehow always knows how to talk him through his trouble spots. Some of his biggest cheerleader have been his friends from preschool and their parents. We have had some HUGE breakthroughs occur within those walls and those amazing people have been a huge part of that. Just last week we had one of those huge breakthroughs. Logan does very well with set boundaries. Last year he really struggled with circle time at school. He used to hide under the easels or get very upset and have huge meltdowns. After we learned about his possible Aspergers we realized he wasn't being difficult, it was too overwhelming for him. With his sensory problems it was just too much for his brain to process. After months and months of circle time we finally got Logan to sit on alphabet rug with the other kids. He felt safe inside the confines of his "L." So day after day Logan would sit on his "L" and nowhere else. This was our saving grace last year, the more time he spent at circle time, the more he got comfortable and the better he did with the overwhelming sensory environment. Now fast forward to this year. Last year there was 8 kids in his class, now there are 15. That "L" became his lifeline. However in a group of 15- 4 year olds, it also become a source of confrontation. Now the kids are 4, I truly believe it is not an intentional act to be mean, but they love to steal the "L" after all if Logan likes it so much it must be magical right? So several months ago my mother made him a special mat with his name Logan B. on it. More about why he prefers to be Logan B later. So we have been trying to retrain Logan B's brain that if someone takes the "L" there are several things you can do:
1. Ask politely if you can have the L
2. Choose a different letter to sit on
3. Or quietly go get your mat and sit there
Now we have been working on this "L" problem for the better part of the year. And we have gone from full out freak outs, to really pretty minor upsets. But last Monday we had our huge BREAKTHROUGH!!! One of the kids had sat on Logan's "L" and calmly and quietly Logan said I guess I should get my mat. He got his mat sat it next to his friend and continued to enjoy cirlce time! One of the parents who will forever hold a special place in my heart rushed right over to give him positive reinforcement for making such a good choice. For those of you you have never dealt with a child with Aspergers it may not sound like much but we have literally spend HOURS AND HOURS of time on this problem. He would cry and cry and come home stressed about why the other kids take his "L" and no matter how many times we explain it or tried to give him alternatives it just wouldn't click! And now with the help of an entire group of everyday angels Logan has learned a valuable cooping technique that hopefully will overflow into other areas of his life. He is starting to accept "change ups" in his everyday routine and as his mother I am so thankful for that!
Now 4 days a week he also attends the REIP which is R. Early Intervention Preschool. It is through his school district and has been a huge blessing. He has his IEP established and has an amazing teacher, several aides and his occupational therapist. These amazing women provide yet another support system for Logan and for us and have help so much with his self esteem and independence. I admit I have not been as involved as I should be at his afternoon preschool. I struggle with how much Mom is too much MOM? He is so independent and the teacher does an amazing job of holding the bar very high for him, which he needs. I feel like I might hold him back by hoovering, he is capable of so much and they have just the right mix to get amazing results. When he first started there he would not acknowledge the teacher when she greeted him in the morning and now he always responds with eye contact, however brief and a "Hello Teacher Marci!" This is where he got his new name Logan B. There are 2 Logans in his class. He decided that it was all or nothing, so everything needed to be changed to Logan B. If forget even on his lunch note he reminds me that Logan is not his name! It is Logan B. :) I thought it was a phase but 5 months later he is still Logan B.
We are still just at the beginning of our very long journey with Aspergers. The things Logan B. has accomplished so far have put my mind at ease that he will be just fine. That Aspergers is just a part of who he is and will NOT define what he will do in the future or what he is capable of. I no longer fear what is ahead but look forward to seeing where this all will lead. We have an amazing network of people ready to catch us if we fall, and help push us when we feel overwhelmed. It may not take a village to raise a child, but it does if you want to do it right!
